Driving

On Wednesday December 8th I took my intermediate test. I was sooo nervous. But like everyone told me I would, I passed. The only thing I wrong is when I was pulling out from parallel parking and I tried to go forward while I was still in reverse. I felt so stupid. But regardless, I passed. It felt so weird when I finally drove alone. There was no one to tell me what to do. I could listen to whatever radio station I wanted and no one could turn it off or change the channel. I was alone and it was nice. I love having the freedom to drive alone. It makes life so much easier. I can sleep in. I get home earlier. It is just all around better. I love it.

Finals

Ah the stress of finals is back again. It's the time of last minute grade checking, begging your teachers for extra credit, and just hoping you can average an "A" for the semester. So this semester is the first semester that I do not have the ability to excempt out of all my classes. I mean I would still have to take four of my classes but I had to the chance to choose which ones I had to take. This year I have a "B" in APUSH (AP US History). It sucks, but the final should be easy since we have a nine weeks test right before the final. Along with APUSH I am taking Floriculture, Computer Graphics, and Drama. That means I get to excempt out of Pre-Calc, Biology, English, and Spanish. These are four of my hardest classes. Even though I am taking my easy finals, I still have a lot of studying to do. That is most likely how I will be spending my weekend. Studying.

Winter

The air is changing and I can feel it. My skin is drier and my hair is darker. But not only is my physical appearance changing, so is the temperature. I love winter holidays and I enjoy an occasional snow day, but this constant below freezing weather I cannot stand. I hate waiting for the bus or having to start my car fifteen minutes before I am supposed to leave and then my car still not be completely warm. Clothing is another problem of winter. I like some of my winter clothes the only problem  is I don’t have very many winter clothes. If I had to pick a season to stay in it would probably be spring or fall. It's not too hot and it's not too cold. It's comfortable. I cannot wait until it warms up. But that is going to be a while. So I guess for now I will just have to look forward to a snow day.

GSA, GSP, and whatever else I have to sign up for...

GSA, GSP, NHS, Beta Club, Drama Club...it's just all too much. I'm sick of having to do all these different things just to help me get into college to go and do more work. I hate the requirements. I hate the deadlines. I hate constantly worrying about all of this. It just adds to the stress of school and I'm sick of it. I want to get into a good college and all but it is so much stress on me right now. I just need a break. I don't even get a break when we have a break from school. I'm still having to work on applications and crap. And on top of all the clubs and organization, I have to worry about the ACT. According to my mother I can never study enough. Its bad enough that I am wasting my Saturday away testing. I don't want to spend hours and hours on it every week. I'm just so sick of school!

Finding a Job

Does anyone ever realize how hard it is for a sixteen year old to find a job that is not in the fast food industry? Most people don’t care where they work but I want to work somewhere that I am going to enjoy. I don’t want to be one of those people who come home and constantly complain about their job. I have to find a job soon though or I might have to settle for the fast food industry. I have put in applications at American Eagle, Vanity, and Journey’s. So far I haven’t received a call from any of these stores. Next I am going to put an application in at Trunell’s Farm Market. I live in Utica and had Mrs. Trunell as a teacher. My parents know the owners, and I am just really hoping I can get a job there. It would be really convenient and close to home. I might also put in an application at Target. I just don’t know yet. I have to get a job soon though if I want to have money to buy Christmas presents. 

The Diary of Anne Frank: The Cast

On Monday November 22^nd auditions were held for our spring production, The Diary of Anne Frank. As you can imagine the part of Anne Frank was somewhere on every girls list of parts they wanted. There was a lot of competition and a lot of pressure to make your audition one to be remembered. So who was the lucky girl to be granted the lead of this play? Me. Out of everyone in the class they chose me. When I found out that I had been casted as Anne Frank, I about fell down the stairs when I went to tell my family.  I was so excited. This was a major role to take on and I was lucky enough to be entrusted with this responsibility. Now I’m not trying to brag. I don’t want to come off as boastful. I am just ecstatic and I just have to let it out. God knows I can’t say anything in drama; I would get attacked. I mean think about it, you have a room full of over dramatic teenagers. I mean isn’t that why we all got into drama? We’re dramatic. So yes there is drama in drama class but that’s just how it goes.

So to all those people who didn’t get the part they wanted, get over it. At least you got a part. You can’t change what has already happened. The past is the past. And then to those people who didn’t get a part at all, it’s ok to be upset but don’t be bringing other people down because they got the part that you wanted. It is not their fault that they got picked over you. I know how it feels not to get a part because last play I was in the lighting booth. You just learn to accept it and move on with your life. And trust me you won’t have near as bad of an experience with the lights as I did. At least you won’t have to sit back and watch your boyfriend make out with another girl on stage. But none the less, with every audition there will be rejection. It’s okay to be rejected and be upset as long as you go about it in the right way. Don’t make other feel bad and suffer with you. Eventually everyone will get over this and we will have yet another great production.

The following is the cast list for The Diary of Anne Frank:

Mr. Frank – Gray

Mr. Van Daan – Russ

Peter – Shaun

Anne – Alissa

Miep – Stephanie

Mrs. Frank – Korin

Mrs. Van Daan – Emily

Margot – Karissa

Mrs. Kraler – Marley

Ms. Dussel – Courtney

Technical Positions:

Backstage – Haley and Nolan

Lights/Sound – Kelsey, Briget, and Hope

House/Publicity/Props - Chase

Thanksgiving

Bring on the turkey, it is Thanksgiving time.  A time filled with food, family, and friends. I time for laughter and coming together. Everyone has their different traditions for Thanksgiving. Mine consists of either lunch or dinner, which ever works with everyone’s hectic schedules, at my mom’s parent’s house. Then usually the opposite meal, lunch or dinner, with my dad’s side of the family. We used to celebrate Thanksgiving for my dad’s side at his parent’s house but since my grandma died a couple years ago we haven’t spent a holiday in that house again. It’s too hard on everyone for it to be at my grandparent’s house, it is especially hard on my grandpa. So we decided that we would move all our holidays right next door to my aunt and uncle’s house. There may be less space but no one can handle being in my grandparent’s house around the holidays. There are so many memories and it is too painful to have them all rush back around the holidays. The holidays are supposed to be a time of happiness and that house would just bring sadness. Sure the memories are happy ones but it hurts to remember them sometimes. Regardless of where my Thanksgiving is spent, it is a time for me to look back on everything I have in life and to be thankful for it.

I have more than I could ever need, but don’t most kids now a days. Sometimes I need to stop focusing on all the little material things in life. If I only focus on material things, I will never be satisfied. There will always be something bigger and better out there. I need to be thankful for the simple things in life like a roof over my head, a family that loves me, parents that are still together and very much in love, friends who love and support me, and the love of a God who is so much bigger and more powerful than I could ever imagine. Thanksgiving is a time to just sit back and enjoy the little things in life.

Works In Progress

This semester in drama we are doing the play Works in Progress. It is a play that is just about high school in general. It is confusing because everyone plays multiple characters. Even I, who has been working on this play since August, still do not completely understand the meaning of this play. It is just another general comic play. Even though we have been working on this play so long, we still are not ready. People are still forgetting their line, missing their cues, and skipping out on our much needed rehearsals. We have rehearsal every other day and in class rehearsal on the day that we don't stay after school. It never fails someone either has to leave early, come late, or they just don't show up at all. We were suppose to have a four hour rehearsal Sunday the 7th but a third of our class never showed up; therefore it was cancelled. We had another four hour rehearsal this past Sunday. Our opening night is the tomorrow. I just hope that people will start to show a little dedication with the next play. Whether we are ready or not the show must go on tomorrow. I hope it turns out better than we all think it will.

Ghosts

I don't really believe in ghost. I never really have. But I am the type of person who will listen to ghost stories and end up freaked out, on the edge of my seat listening to every word. I do, on the other hand, believe in spirits or angels. I believe that there is a higher power up there somewhere. My mom has told me that once when she was younger she woke up to see an angel at the foot of her bed. She says that what she saw was her guardian angel. Not long after my grandma died, my grandpa said that one night he woke up and saw her standing by the bed. We all say that she was keeping watch over him. I believe in guardian angels but I am afraid of what might happen if I ever see one. I just don't know what I would do. I would think that I would be freaked out but my mom and my grandpa describe it as a very calming experience; that it brings peace of mind. I believe that my grandma is watching over all of us. I believe in guardian angels but not ghosts. I still get creeped out by the thought of ghost though.

Halloween Traditions

My family likes to follow the same Halloween traditions every year. We always go to my grandma's to trick or treat and eat chili. My grandma's birthday is October 30 so we always celebrate her birthday on Halloween. My family has never been real big on going to haunted houses or wearing scary costumes. Halloween to us is eating chili and trick or treating. The past two years I haven't gone trick or treating because I feel like I'm too old. This year it didn't really feel like Halloween. We still had chilli and all that but Halloween was actually Sunday so it felt weird doing our Halloween traditions on the 30th. Halloween just wasn't the same this year.

Scary Movies

I don't like scary movies. I just can't sit through them. If I watch a scary movie I am going to scream half of the time. I can handle scary movies better than haunted houses though. The scary movies stay on the screen. In haunted houses people jump out and get in my face. I am just not big on the thrill factor. I am starting to want to watch scary movies this year. I feel out of the loop when people are talking about this movie that they recently seen or have seen in the past and I have no clue what they are talking about because I don't watch scary movies. A lot of people can laugh at scary movies but I can't. I am the type of person who covers their face for half the movie and screams the other half. Scary movies just aren't for me.

Thespian Festival

The Thespian Festival was held at Western. We left at 9 on October 22 and didn't get back home until 1. There were competitions, performances, workshops, and a dance. It was so much fun. The workshops were a little boring but everything else was great. It was nice to watch other schools put on a play. It is neat when you know how much work they had to have put into it. When you watch a play you think that it is impossible for someone to be able to memorize that many lines, but you know that when you are working on a play the lines are pretty easy to memorize. Overall it was a fun trip. The best part was the bus ride. We decided that our bus driver's name was Dale, and we started calling Mrs. Berry mom. It was a lot of fun and the memories will last long after it ended.

Haunted Houses

Every Halloween many people love to go to haunted houses. I am not one of those people. I have just recently went to my first haunted house. It was my friends sixteenth birthday so I had to go. When we got to the haunted houses it took all of us like ten minutes to get the nerve to just go in. We went ahead and bought the combo ticket. We first went to the catacombs. We got down there and waited for a big group to come. My friend Brandi (it was her sixteenth birthday, her idea to go, and she was just as scared as I was) and I walked with our head buried in our friends' backs and kept our eyes closed for most of it. Brandi decided when we were three fourths of the way done that she wanted out. She told the guy that was handing out 3D glasses that she was about to have a panic attack and needed out. She drug me along with her. I kind of wanted to finish but our group had moved on and I wasn't going alone. Once we were both outside we were shaking. The others came out and said it was no big deal (they both love haunted houses and walked through it with a you don't scare me kind of attitude). They tried to get us to go through the House of Lecter but Brandi and I just couldn't do it. Looking back I feel that I could have made it through both. I freaked myself out more than the haunted houses did. If my friends decide to go again, I am going to go and make it through both haunted houses. I know I can if I don't psych myself out first.

Homecoming

We finally have a homecoming dance. It's about dang time. The school needs to hold more dances. Sure there are still going to be the same people who don't give a crap, but many students enjoy the dances. My friends and I love them. There's nothing like spending $80 on a dress to go get dressed up to hang out with friends. I love the act of trying on dresses more than actually paying the outrageous amount of money for them, even if it is your parent's money. Speaking of money, I find it quite ridiculous that the girl spends all this money on a dress, shoes, hair, make up, and accessories and the guy gets by with barely paying a thing. Sure the guy pays for dinner but he doesn't have to spend a lot to dress up. Paying for dinner does not amount to buying a dress. Girls really get the shaft when it comes to dances, weddings, parties, or just clothing in general. For dances it's the girl who spends money on a dress. For weddings, the girl's parents cover most the cost. Parties are a little more equal but girls just generally spend more. For clothing girls will always pay more. Girls worry about brands and the type of clothing. Not to mention all the money spent on accessories. Purses for instance can range from $20 to $300. I have to say that I fall in with the girls that spend $100 to $200 on a purse. I just can't help that I love Coach purses. But moving on, I am looking foreward to Homecoming. I can't wait to get dress up and spend hours on my hair just for it to fall. Oh well. It is the memories that makes it worth all the money and time.

Grades

Oh wonderful, glorious grades. The stress of every teens life as the end of the nine weeks is quickly approaching. The pressure to get those last few points to make your grade a little more acceptable. Working your butt off on those last few assignments so that you can try and hope to bring your grade up. This is how my life has been for the past couple of weeks. Grades have been the main thing on my mind. I have always been a straight "A" student and that is the standard that my parents and myself hold me to. That is a lot of pressure when I am taking all honors classes along with one AP class. I currently have three "B"s. That is the most I have ever had at one point in time and one of them is a borderline "C". Thinking about grades just makes me want to cry. Grades are so stressful and it is all I think about anymore. I am so sick of feeling like I can't get a break with grades. I think I'm doing good in a class and then a quiz comes along and I don't do so good and my grade drops drastically. Everyone said that sophomore year would be the hardest but I am starting to think that junior year is going to be a lot worse. I would only have one or two "B"s at a time last year and now I have three. On a scale of one to ten of stress, grades are a twenty. Grades are the worst part about school. I can understand a topic but just completely fail the tests because of how questions are worded. I hate worrying about my grades all day every day. I just wish all the stress of school would just disappear. 

Cupidity

This was a recent topic of discussion in my youth group at church. Cupidity is the stupid things people will do for love. Some people want to be loved so bad that they do stupid things to give themselves a false sense of love. Love does not come from the things you do. Love is how you feel. Love can not be determined by physical acts. Love is an emotional connection between two people. Love is complex and no one can truly understand it.
Relationships are often a topic of discussion in my youth group because relationships are a huge part of our lives. Most of the times it is repetitive, but it is things that we need to hear. It maybe uncomfortable, but it is important to talk about. Love is amazing, but only when it is true.

People who live in glass houses, should not throw stones...

No good can ever come of gossip. Even though everyone does it, does not mean that is it right. Gossip can be hurtful and result in horrible circumstances. No one has the right to talk bad about another person. No one is above someone else. A person that is constantly finding the bad or wrong in others, will end up with not a lot of friends. That person just has a negative attitude and no one wants to be around someone who is constantly negative. Gossip can not be good in any way, but it swarms around every high school, middle school, and even elementary school. Gossip doesn't just occur at school, even though that is where the majority takes place. It also occurs in the work place. There is no true way to get rid off gossip. Someone is always going to have something to say about something or someone. Gossip is hurtful and wrong, and no one should ever have to endure.

Thursdays

When you wake up on a Thursday morning, you feel that much closer to the end of the week. It's almost Friday; a time for friends and family and just relaxing. This Thursday is even more exciting because this Friday will be early release and Sadie Hawkins. I can't wait to get out of school at 12:20 and hang out with friends. It will be nice to go out to eat for lunch instead of having to either pack my lunch or deal with what the school serves. Thursdays are great because it mean when I wake up the next day it is Friday and I am almost done with school for the week. After Friday and Saturday, Thursday would have to be one of my favorite days of the week.

Laughter

Ha ha ha, lol, rofl, lmao, or he he he, they all translate the same way: something someone said or did made you laugh. Laughter is the best medicine for anyone. It can really brighten up someone's day. I am currently dating the king of humor, Gray. I can't remember a single day that he hasn't made me laugh. That probably has to be one of my favorite things about him. When I'm upset about something, he can make me laugh and things will seem just a tiny bit better. A sense of humor is important to me, but humor can only be taken in moderation. Joking around is great, but only when it is the right time. If someone is constantly joking non stop, it can just be annoying. When I say non stop I mean for like days on end. It takes a lot for me to get tired of laughing. Laughter can help anyone. Humor is one of the best personality traits a person can have.

Pre-Sadie Hawkins

Sadie Hawkins, or sadies for short, is the first dance of the school year. Not only is it the first dance, it is also ladie's choice. For all of those people out there who think that sadies is dumb, get over yourself. Quit trying to act like you hate everything about life. Sadie Hawkins is a great time to hang out with friends. I personally enjoy getting to use my imagination to come up with a really nice shirt to have made. Some girls just go with the flannel but I like the idea of making a shirt, even if I only wear it once. The good thing about sadies these past two years is that I didn't have to worry about finding someone to go with; I had Gray. It is really nice to not have to worry about finding someone to ask. But even if  you don't have a date, like i didn't freshman year, you will still have fun; just go with a group of your best friends. I always look forward to Sadie Hawkins and I can't wait for the 17th.

Parents

Parents. Everyone has them. They are the people you will always love but not always like. You fight, you yell, but you always end up making up.Your parents are always there for you. They teach you right from wrong. They have raised you from the beginning. They know you better than anyone else. They have been with you through you good and bad days. They have a huge influence on who you are. They are the ones who control what and when you do something. They wake you up when your late for school. They have driven you to school, soccer practice, drama rehearsal, ballet, and games. I love my parents and I wouldn't trade them for the world.

Home

     Home, for most, is a safe place. It's a safe haven. To me, home means safety. It also means love. Home is where my family is. My family supports me and loves me. Home is the one place I truley feel safe. I can't wait to get home after a long day at school. It is where I'm comfortable. Home is a place that you can always go back to. You know that you can always count on home being there when you need it.  
     I feel like I want to leave home but then again I don't. I am ready to explore the world and see what it has to offer, but I am not ready to leave the safety, comfort, and love behind. I know that when it is time for me to leave, I can count on being able to return home when I have seen what there is to see. I will always feel safe at home.

Picture Day

Picture day is dreaded by every high school student. Most girls plan out what they are going to wear a couple days before and most guys put a little more effort into what they wear. I, like most girls, had my outfit all planned out, but there was a problem. The shirt I wanted to wear some how magically got a stain on it. So I took care of the stain last night but when I woke up this morning my shirt was all wrinkled. I put it in the dryer with the "wrinkle shield" on and it came out a little less wrinkled but still kind of wrinkled. Not only was my shirt messed up this morning, but i woke up twenty minutes late. It was a typical picture day morning. Nothing ever goes right on picture day.

Twilight

Twilight. A word some people love and others despise. The Twilight Saga. A series of books that many girls obsess over and guys could care less about. Personally I love the series. Call me whatever you want but I love twilight. I own all of the books and both movies that have been released on DVD. I also own Stephenie Meyer's newest book in the Twilight Saga, The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner. I find the books to be interesting and entertaining. I feel like I'm in Forks when I read the books. I want Bella to be with Edward. I feel what Bella feels when Edward leaves. I feel the friendship of Bella and Jacob and the jealousy that Jacob feels toward Edward. I can feel Edward's protectivness as if he was watching over me. Stephenie Meyer gets you completely absorbed in the series. I was excited to begin the series and sad when it ended. I want the series to continue. I want to know what happens in Bella's new life and what happens between Jacob and Renessme. I am completely obsessed with the series. I <3 Twilight.

Family

Family. Family is the only thing in life that never goes away. Family is there for you when your friends are not. Desmond Tutu once said,"You don't choose your family. They are God's gift to you, as you are to them." Anthony Brandt once said,"Other things may change us, but we start and end with the family." I find these quote to be very true. Family are the people who influence you and make you who you are. My family is very important to me. Nothing is going to stand between me and my family. I am the oldest and there is nothing that I would'nt do if my brother or sister needed help. Family is love and love is family.  

Junior Year

Junior Year. Finally considered an upper classman. It was great to come back and see everyone again. Summer was great though. Summer was full of long days and sleeping in, no schedule to follow, and nothing but fun. Summer came with summer jobs too, which often made it hard to hang out with friends. It's hard to find a way to work around everyone's schedule. It never fails though, there is always some way to hang out with friends. Although I am sad summer is over, I am happy to be back. It looks like this year is going to be great. I have a lot of friends in all of my classes and Drama should be interesting with just one class. I'm looking forward to what this year will bring.